How do I feel after playing Outta this Kingdom? I feel as though I just got back from some bad acid trip that mashed up my old favorite Saturday morning cartoons and then vomited rainbow colors all over them.
That's how I feel.
From the moment I started Outta this Kingdom, I knew there was going to be trouble. The voice acting had me... ME rolling my eyes and making gagging motions. Yes, I'm so mature. Our main character, Rachel, a "housewife on vacation" with her cat is suddenly cast into some far off magical kingdom by an evil villain who looks like Dr. Doofenshmirtz's "special" cousin.
But wait, it gets better... Rachel has driven her car into a pond... silly girl... and now needs to be rescued by a man who looks like He-man wearing Rainbow Brite's castoffs. She tilts her head and lifts her leg in a cute airhead style while muscle man attempts to rescue this damsel in distress. Ok... Liz would have smoke coming out of her ears by now... but then an elemental monster shows up... because well... why not?? And she throws a glowing ball at it and it disintegrates. Confused yet? I know I am.
I mean, I know it's supposed to be silly... I get it... and there were things that had me laughing out loud, like when the ice queen was holding an ice cream pop, or when the fire elemental was roasting a pig above his head. Hysterical little details... but are we trying just a little too hard?
The bright Candyland colors, the ridiculous outfits... the outfits... don't get me started on the outfits... Rachel honey... you look like you lost part of your sock... oh wait don't worry... I found it... it's on your arm. Oh honey... I bet someone told you that was a sassy look. It's not. It's a sock on your arm. You look like an idiot.
And Jake... you stole Rainbow Brite's colors and her logo. You've been doing way too many arm curls with your left arm because it looks like it could beat up the right... and oh... there's a belt on your shoe... did you know? Just... right there... a belt... yeah.
Oh and sir what's your face... the knight that looks and sounds like the Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons... Uh... you might want to check your gut... cause it's falling out... your underwear too... yeah... I see those heart shapes. You spent all that time gussying up your hair... and you didn't stop to check if your panties were showing?
Again... yes I get it's supposed to be silly... but maybe they don't have to hit us over the head with the absurdities? This game had more mad people than Wonderland... and that's going overboard.
Oh and one more thing... we're supposed to get this flirty type dynamic going on with Jake and Rachel throughout the game, with the cat Martha in there to provide some sort of comic antagonism to Jake... but, can I just remind everyone about one tiny little detail we learned in the beginning... Rachel... is a housewife... key word being "wife." Wouldn't you assume then that she was married to... someone else??? I swear I didn't make this up! It shows it in the very beginning! Go back and play it if you don't believe me!!
"Yes, we get it, Tracy... the story is crazy, but how does the game play?" Well... pretty good actually. I was surprised, once I got over how truly bizarre the game is... The gameplay is truly nothing like I've ever encountered in a time management game. So I'll give them marks for that.
First, you have a few characters that have different roles assigned to them. The cat, Martha, can run and get food for your workers. Rachel can deal with elementals and sometimes talk to people. Jake, aka, Rainbow Brite, can do some of the heavy lifting like fighting off scary gingerbread soldiers or eating through gates made of candy. Your workers, who are sporting a handlebar mustache that would put Rollie Fingers to shame, will do basically everything else including chopping, lifting, gathering, and picking up random items.
Speaking of those random items... this was the first time where I played a time management game where an inventory came into play. You had to collect items like an ax or a torch or something similar, and then click on the item in your inventory and use them on areas on the map.
For example, say there was a locked chest on the map. Your workers can't open it until they get the key, bring it back to the tent, and then have you use the key on the chest. Then you can click on it to have them open it. This puts a bit of a pause in your step if you're used to queuing up your orders and, admittedly adds a whole new level of gameplay that is both challenging and exciting.
The music on the other hand is something you would imagine hearing in a German beer festival, complete with lederhosen and a few yodelers. It was a happy beat of mostly tuba and brass that reminded me of the old polka music my grandmother loved. Happy music she called it, and I guess I'd have to agree with her... you can't help bobbing your head along with the melody... no matter how much you hate it.
Overall, I think Outta This Kingdom had its moments... both good and bad. I enjoyed the gameplay, but the rest of the ridiculous tomfoolery... great now I sound like my grandmother... ok well... let's just say that if you're looking for a fun game and are able to put aside your dignity and embrace the staggering amounts of silliness in this game, then Outta This Kingdom could be for you... for me... I'll just remember my Saturday morning cartoons as they were without these weird doppelgangers getting in the way. I'm talking to you Rainbow Brite.